Loneliness

 

To be without your famliy or friends makes the change extra challenging, and it can take some time before you get to know new people. In addition, it may be difficult to understand the language and the cultural codes of the new country. You probably need to communicate in English - and if you do not have English as your mother tongue it can be difficult to nuance the language.

To feel lonely does not mean you lack social skills 

It is common to feel shame and to think that it is because of one’s own shortcomings, butyou should remember that you do not lack social skills just because you are feeling lonely.You may have ended up in a vicious circle. Have you started avoiding social gatherings? Do you easily interpret other people’s signals as disinterest? Are you worried that your language skills are not enough in your social contacts?

Homesickness is common among international students

It is common as an international student to experience periods of homesickness. Being new as an international student it could feel like you are losing a part of yourself. In such circumstances, it can be reassuring to talk to friends and family at home who really know you and with whom you are comfortable.

At the same time, it is important to try to make new friends that you can rely on and have fun with. The feeling of homesickness usually disappears when you create new social relationships in your current environment. It is important that you try to find a balance between your new life as a student in a new country and keeping in touch with friends and family at home.  

Some advice to break out of loneliness 

• Look for contexts where you can meet like-minded people.
  Join a student association, participate in the student union’s social activities for students, or start from your interests and sign up for a course of your choosing. In many locations the church at the university/college organizes activities where you can participate and meet new friends.  
• Dare to contact people around you.
  If you are not a native English speaker; remember that the more you use the language,the more secure you feel in relation with others. You can start by asking a fellow course member to study together, have coffee or go for a walk to practice talking to others.  
• Say yes to social activities.
  And do so even if it feels awkward before you get to know someone. Take care of yourself and understand that you are not alone in finding it challenging to come to a new environment.  

When to seek professional help 

It can be a good idea to get professional support if you need help managing your feelings and thoughts about loneliness, especially if you need to deal with mental illness related to loneliness, such as depression or social anxiety, or if you have difficulty knowing how to create and maintain relationships with others.   

If you have a Swedish social security number, you can contact the health centre to make an appointment with a doctor or counsellor, and then pay the same subsidized fee as Swedish citizens. You can also seek help via 1177.se. 

If you are unsure where to turn to get help, you can contact the Student Health office.